Ehh, ahhh, ick

Self,

I don't know where to start..............

So the last few days I have been feeling  rather "blah."  Honestly, I think it more accurate to say that I have been feeling that my life has no meaning.

NO - I AM NOT SUICIDAL!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

As drab/mediocre/pathetic and any other adjectives that could be inserted there that I may think my life is right now...I still prefer living than being dead, so again  I AM NOT SUICIDAL!

However I don't know what I need to or can do to feel as if my life has more meaning.

And as I been grappling and stewing with these feelings, I saw something on Yahoo today that didn't help me to feel any better.

There's an article about the newest elected mayor of Ithaca, New York.   He's kinda handsome, I think he might be gay, but it didn't say. He was featured because - He's only 24!  He's the youngest mayor that town has ever had.  I wouldn't be surprised if he isn't one of the youngest mayors anywhere currently.  He's a graduate of Cornell (I think.)  He had a tough childhood due to drug addict father, bi-racial background, periods of homelessness.   I mean talk about being someone to make an impact.  Hearing about this guy makes me feel like I'm just taking up space.

Again, I'm not suicidal
............................................................................................................but damn!

Sincerely,
Pharoah