Would You Ever??? (PRIVATE: NSFW)

Self,
Let me start off by letting you this is NOT SAFE FOR WORK., for chil'ren unless you want to do some 'splainin', or anyone else you don't want all up in your "PRIVATE" business. You heard?

So the day that I went to the Playboy Jazzfestival...was a day of many things.  As I had mentioned I was late getting to the Hollywood Bowl...for a number of reason...but this was part of the reason.....

 Well ok my experience with the 2012 World Naked Bike Riders wasn't quite like the first picture (although I do like the REAR-END on the biker with the black and red bag.) This second picture is more like (actually almost exactly) what I saw.....SLOWING me the FUCK DOWN as I was trying to get to the concert. Between the slow ASS bikers and the drivers slowing down to get a peek, maybe even a PEAK, and pictures I think they added an extra 30 minutes to my travel time because I got caught in a bottleneck BEHIND them.

Now I had intended to write about this right after it happend....BUTT tother things got in the way.  On one hand I guess it's not a bad thing that I'm a little slow because it gave me a chance to find pictures to share....lol and comment on.  When I did the google search, I read some of the articles that went with the pictures and found out that the World Naked Bike Ride is a movement that promotes being eco-friendly.  The main idea behind the movement is to reduce the use of automobiles...and the nudity is just to get your attention to bring awareness to their cause....(Sex sells...even when there's nothing to buy.  I mean here it is a month later after I saw them and they are still crossing my mind due to the nudity, right?)

Let me say that these are not my pictures of the event I happen to do a google search for "nude bike riders" and the links led me to these pictures.  in truth I didn't see a whole lot of the nudity in my travels that day.  I mean yes I saw enough exposed skin to say "OH shit, they're naked" .....then  it was very much "I wish they would get they naked asses out my mutha fuckin way." 

LMAO.  Anyway here are some pics that I found and...well caught my eye!

These first two I just thought were funny and creative uses of body paint.

Come on you got to admit "The Cat in the Hat" and "The Grinch" is funny.  Is it me or does his hat seem to resemble a condom?  Well I guess you could also say it is also suggestive of a phallus.....no?  I wonder how much did they each have to spend to get that much body paint?  And who applied it for them?  (I am not assuming that they are together, although the common theme of Dr. Seuss' characters may highly suggest the likelihood of there being some cooridination on their part. But that said, it doesn't mean that they would have been comfortable as two men touching each other's naked bodies, to apply the body paint.)

So I like the idea of a basketball player. and on a unicycle....that alone I'm sure made him stand out in the crowd. I so totally was buy him as Larry Bird....with the blond hair and the green and white for the Celtics.....then I read the "Seattle 15" and was confused....lol and wondered if he was too. 

Now can we talk about the positioning of his "twig and berries."  Is it me or does it looks like that hurts a bit, or at the minimum is a bit uncomfortable?  I mean they do look as if they are being smashed.  Question; so did he have to seperate his balls to each side of his penis as he sat on the seat or is that just a coincidence?

I'm sorry I just have to confess that I think the implication of the writing "GO GREEN" equates to going "Down" is rather sexy.  I wonder what he looks like above the lips.I mean his body is fair...and yeah I would be curious to play with his "johnson."  The same goes for this guy walking getting a high five. Would you look at those abs! I'm a little disappointed that the abs are about the only thing you can make out in the photo...but oh well.

LMAO!!!  I would not mind placing my hands on the prints!  Of course if I was the one who applied the body paint to get those prints....he would probably just have two red streaks/strips back there from me gripping his ass from various angles multiple times.  As I kept looking through pictures, I found this other one with the two guys and realized that the guy with more pigment was my handprint on the ass guy from the front.  NO he don't have major abs but I still feel he has some sexy appeal. If he approached me to ask me out, I'd say yes.  I like men with a variety of body types....he as a stockiness to himself that I think is attractive.  The guy with the crown next to my handprint guy....does have some abs. Does he have an erection or is that just how he hangs and swangs?

Nothing too profound...I find these two sexy also...mostly the one with the spotted loin cloth, but the other seems to have a decent body also....his lower half...thighs will get me every time!  However the fact that it looks like he has toilet paper hanging out/off his ass...is such a downfall for him.

OK I had to take a break from talking about the guys that I found sexy.  "Bike Free" doesn't have much of an ass, he seems like he is probably older, and since we can't see his face I can't say if he has that distinguished gentleman thing going for him.  What caught my eye was the legs.  I mean the left looks at best average...but the right looks all musckular and stuff.

Guess what....I found a picture of an African-american from the event.  He might even be the token attendee but for sure the token photo-op. So can we talk about this brother? Really?? An afro, and tongue hanging out.  Yeah I know, I know WAY too fuckin skinny....but PHAT in the right place!  I wonder if there were a bunch of guys pissed this brother showed up that day.  LOL I wonder how many secret "n*gga" he was called? 

OK so clearly from the discussion of al the photos up to now it's safe to say I'm a gay man.  That said, Yes I am aware that this next picture is a woman.  All I can say is that ...well for some reason the idea of having sex in that position seems REALLY appealing to me.

Ok now that you have seen a few pictures and get a slight idea of what the event is about....could you go naked in public?  Say at a nude beach? Or even on a naked bike ride?  These last two pictures are are here to represent what I believe would currently be the only way I think I could go through with something like this.  Tecate taste ok but I would require something strong than just beer....and probably so much so I probably wouldn't really be able to stay on the bike.  AND if I did manage to drink enough to have the courage to get on a bicycle naked and have the wherewithall to funtion properly, I would need some sort of mask....and this guy is still missing the wild wig and big sunglasses that I would wear.

 Sincerely,

Pharoah