More Ups & Downs from Memorial Weekend.

Self,

So I was in Phoenix for several days and the incident with the 5AMer was actually still pretty early in my visit and there were others guys I had planned to meet....both of these are platonic connections.

The first is an up situation. we have been chatting for a while and we simply conversed while stuffing our faces....no problems.  The guy, IC, seems cool and I think we will continue to build towards a good friendship.

The down....well is should have been an up...but it went wrong. I already have decided what I'm going to do but I'm just getting it off my chest.

So this guy, WG, we had talked years ago and reconnect a while back...I think even before I met KB...but there wasn't any romance talk because he is in a relationship...so was I at the time. And we mostly played "Word with Friends," Scramble with Friends," and "Hanging with Friends."  Nothing major.

So the Sunday of the holiday weekend we planned to meet initially at The Coffee Bean & Tea Leaf....but I was getting hungry and suggest lunch. Then he says something about not being sure if he want's to tell his boyfriend about me because his boyfriend gets jealous easily.  I could care less if he tells the boyfriend or not so I am confused and text, "Well it's up to you....I doubt you plan to take me back to your plave to have hot sex on a platter so there's really nothing for him to be jealous about. but you know him best."

"Yeah he is crazy sometimes...and your moral values would prevent us from having hot sex on a platter."

I send, "My moral values or yours?" [Side bar...I'm a guy, I wasn't looking for sex, didn't really have any interest in sex with him....but I'm a guy...if you are going to offer than I'm going to be open to it...besides my feelings about it is that I can always say no at any time....even if you are standing in front of me naked with an erection...if I'm not feeling it then I'm not feeling it. So since he made the offer I'll see where it goes.]

"Ours, but if you want to come over tomorrow you can send the night. That would be better."

"So you don't want to meet today?"

"If you want a shot at sex tomorrow is better cuz he'll be home and I'll be at my place."

I send, "LOL oh so you want to have sex? Well we can postpone...but lunch today doesn't mean no sex tomorrow."

"LOL.  I told [the boyfriend] and he acting up so I told him you are heading back in the morning. I'll see you tomorrow night XXXX Streent name here."

The next day I try to get WG to set a time to meet because I was to also coordinate meeting with IC because where I was staying is like 30 miles outside the city I didn't want to meet IC then drive to My cousin's then turn around to drive back to Phoenix to meet up with WG. We set a time but then he flakes on meeting by saying the boyfriend is drunk and he wants to go home with him.   I understood and let it go.

So a couple days later I'm going about my business at home and get a text from WG saying hi and he sorry I didn't get the sex I was wanting in there in Phoenix.

I told him I was not looking for sex and that it was his suggestion and remind him that I said that we WEREN'T having sex so there was nothing for his boyfriend to be jealous about.
He then said he made the offer to go to his place as a test because he was curious about my motives..but sex didn't really cross his mind.

Then he gives me a load of crap about how he wish I respected relationships more but he respects me immensely for being honest about my willingness to mess with guys who are in relationships.  Then texts, " You values and mine are very different mine, You are moe selfish. There is an innocent party involved, someone who your moment of greediness and disrespect may directly -god forbid- or if the innocent one is lucky inadvertently affect.  The fact that your moral prism doesn't include that person in view is disconerting is all Im saying. It's short sighted, myopic and selfish to put it mildly."

Im floored at the audacity. I send back "Hmm that's really the pot callin the kettle black...the meer suggestion that YOU were willing to cheat on your relationship shows the same selfishness and disrepect for the innocent part. Which makes your accessment of my "moral compass" quite hypocritical."

"Not at all....blah blah blah...I don't expect that we'll agree on the matter at all because we dont come from the same moral upbringing-we dont have the same value system so I don't expect you to "get it" as it were, but I'm just expessing myself for the bery selfish motive of getting it off my chest. I don't expect to win you to my side whatsoever, your values are something you are content with and I respect it, but it informs me what access I can offer to my life."

"I feel you are back pedallin since I've told you how your test was flawed ...because it is crazy to think your boyfriend is going to be jealous of two friends meeting for lunch so raising that point was the initial problem because really it's a mute point.  However I'm tired of this game...u want to stand in judment...then so be it.  What I get is that u have a need to be self-righteous and feel that u are superior in some way....so you can have that too.  I don't want a friend who is going to try to judge me when he sets me up to fail. So we can keep the accest to each other like it is.  Sorry my attempt to get to know u better was just a game for you."

Then he says he agrees contact should be limited and the conversation should be more "surface" which I took to meanhe meant superficial and asked me if I heard any good music lately...

I intertained that for a bit...but really I wasn't interested in the convo anymore. 

Truth of the matter is that I think we have a different opinion of what "limited access" to each other will mean, I'm not sure what he think it means but suffice it to say...from this point on...for me the only access I'm allowing is the continued participation of the games of Scamble and Hanging with friends....something I do with random strangers anyway...and now I know he's nothing more than that.

Sincerely,
Pharoah